As the title suggests….I have been feeling a little bit overwhelmed. I was warned by various outlets that you get to a point in your second or third year of nursing and there is a mental block. I think I have been having a mini one. Nothing too serious, just a lack of motivation and a wealth of procrastination. I have had a lot of things going on outside of my nursing bubble and this is where you truly realise that nursing is your life. I can’t do anything without thinking about how it impacts my studies or placement hours – even being sick!
The pressure to achieve is also high. I don’t think that this is because university pressure me to do well although they want me to, but more a personal feeling of wanting to be a really really good, knowledgable nurse. Sometimes I feel as if I know absolutely nothing. Especially when a coursemate mentions something they have learnt and I sit and stare blankly back at them! However, I am lucky in the sense that the people on the children’s nursing course are all lovely and supportive. I think many of us feel a bit like this. Perhaps it’s the time of year?
I have just finished 2 weeks of a simulation placement which I found highly stressful due to simulated role plays with actors and the work we needed to complete. Role play just isn’t my thing but I can see why it is in the curriculum as you can’t please everyone. I know lots of people benefitted from the role play sessions. I’m much more of a hands on person who learns better in real life situations, as I have done throughout my working life. I’d much rather be thrown into the deep end, get my head down and work like that. Role play always fills me with fear and dread just like those drama lessons in secondary school did – which was quite a while ago now! Due to my lack of motivation, I have got rid of my Facebook app and put my iPad in the other room. Yesterday was the first day where I actually felt like I had done something productive in a long time – well since starting placement 8 weeks ago! I managed to crack some nursing calculations and do some exam preparation for January. I’m one of those people who has to work hard at stuff as I am not blessed with a photographic memory. I have been thinking of ways to learn the abundance of information we have been bombarded with the last few months. I probably need to invest in some coloured pens and do some drawings as I learn visually. I think that’s why I have always found maths hard because I found it hard to visualise the working out bit! My fear of maths actually put me off aplying for nursing for a few years.
Right now I feel like I am treading water but I know that if I put the effort and work in like I did last year I will be okay. Hard work always gets you somewhere! Bring on the late night library sessions….